To the girl in front of the camera,

Before the limelight, before the applause, before the standing ovation, I see you, and I welcome you as you are. Daughter, sister, friend, musician, writer, dancer… actor; before all of that, I see you. Your identity is fluid; it is not confined to the constraints of time, nor is it confined to the standards set by society. Your core is strong. You know who you are and what you are capable of. You know the strengths and qualities God gave you. It has taken you a while to get here. I know why you are here; you know why you are here. Sometimes I am your biggest critic, many times, I am your greatest comforter.

To the girl in front of the camera,

When I see you, I see the little girl who just discovered her God-given talent, a gift she kept to herself for so long because it would not be seen as a viable career in the eyes of her peers. I see the little girl with endless bounds of wonder and passion in her eyes; A girl that would spend her days dancing and singing with great energy and enthusiasm for life. Little did she know she was conditioning herself to be on the scene.

I hear you, I hear your low register voice, I hear the tones and the depth so when they tell you to “try sounding more like a girl”, don’t listen. Soon you will learn that embracing the life of an entertainer will come with all sorts of unprecedented criticism. “Why are you underdressed?” “Why are you overdressed?” “Why are you too tough?”…“You really don’t have to do all of this for the attention of men, you know” You will feel hurt when you hear these comments, but remember to breathe. Life is always going to test you. When someone comes to you with criticism, neither fair, nor kind, and you gain nothing from it, let it go! Remember that pain must come into your life to do a work, when the work is done, the pain will leave you.  The people that will criticize you will be there to show you who you are by your reaction, not by their words. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.

To the girl in front of the camera,

When I see you, I see the young woman who puts herself out there but constantly spends time in a room called ‘no’. She will receive no, after no, after no, after no. She will feel disappointed and she will feel like everybody has let her down. Take heart, because she will also receive some big yesses. Rejection is part of the process. Make a promise to never give up on yourself – after all, you are not doing it for their approval. Remember that life is full of challenges. Granted, because you are a woman your challenges are going to be different to a man’s. It is a man’s world in business, in science, in construction, in art; in virtually every industry out there, it is a man’s world. You will face more challenges than they will, but that won’t stop you. You can decide to either sit back and loath in fear or to try and try and try and try, until you succeed.

When they see you, you will be on the world stage, alongside legendary actors and musicians. You too, are a legendary actor and musician. Yes, I said you are legendary. You will have all sorts of questions in your mind. “Are they interested in my artistry or the fact that it was a huge international gig?” “If it was a play that I curated here in Malawi, for myself, would they still be interested in me?” Remember to treat every opportunity, big or small, with equal importance. Don’t begrudge the small opportunities, treat them with as much respect as you would the bigger opportunities. You will not be able to sustain the result without the process. While you are in the process surrender to God’s love and divine plan. Remember that you are exactly where you need to be!

To the girl in front of the camera,

Your God-given talent is now your vocation; your peers too, finally see it as a viable career. You spent so much time doing what everyone else wanted you to do, but you are finally pursuing your dream. Don’t you love being able to work at something you love every day? The people you work with are also chasing big dreams and you love to be around their energy. Now that your lifelong passion is your fulltime career, remember that it deserves love and respect. Your journey as an artist requires discipline. Find a balance and always find time for the people and things that are important to you.

In all situations, in every room, on every stage and in front of that camera, remember who you are and where you have come from.

Love always,

Lily Banda